I swear he was the one for me. The one who looked into my eyes and saw my soul. The one who knew I wasn’t okay even when I said I did. The one who cared for me deeply and protectively. The one who fought for my destiny and future. The one who fought for my clarity and inner healing. Who cared for my deepest wounds. Who made sure to be a constant part of my life in highs and lows. Who made time for me when others wanted to be with him. Who made effort to get to know my thoughts and feelings through the many defensive layers I had. Who loved me deeply and unashamedly.
He who loved me with a fierce steadfast honoring love. Who did not dare to disrespect me or want to hurt me. But loved my soul. Loved me for my everything. Accepted my pain and circumstances, and yet still fought for my freedom. Who prayed for me and my well-being. Who invited me to the river and walks and concerts. Who unknowingly romanced me to fall in love with a young rugged carefree homegrown authentically sweet man. And who said he loved me. Oh I miss these feelings. The protection and sweet love. The consideration.
He who considered my feelings and loved me well. Who apologized generously for his mistakes. Who reflected on the man he was and was trying to be. Who reflected on his actions and his lifestyle. Who loved others with thoughtfulness and kindness. With care and understanding. With the patience to see things through.
My dear friend I miss you. I did not know what I had then that I know now. Sorry for my mistakes and pain. I loved you with a deep special strong connecting love. I still love you dearly, but I must let you go. Thank you for seeing me when no one else saw me. Thank you for caring for me when no one else cared for me. Through the thick and thin you’ve been amazing.